Dear Claudia Puig at USA Today

First off, I'd like to apologize for being absent for so long, I've been quite busy with not enough time to Rant. How sad. Anyways, onto my Rant! (Yes I know it's a bit late, sorry)

Dear Claudia Puig at USA Today,

I'd like to thank you for your lovely review of Repo! The Genetic Opera in a national newspaper.

No, not really. Want to know what I think? I think you went in there expecting it to be something that it wasn't. There really is no catagorizing this movie. Now I've seen it twice. The first time I went in, just excited to be there at the Fantastic Film Festival and had a great time. It's true what they say, Repo! is not just a movie, it's an event. I went in there with no idea what to expect. And when I got out, I was the most satisfied person there. Where you say the movie lacks, I say the movie flourished.

"The second-biggest mystery is why this unfunny, unscary, preposterous bloodbath about organ transplants is opening at all."

Ouch. There must be a reason you're called a "movie critic" that's all you do. You could've pointed out that the movie had dark humor that was clear enough to make you laugh, but dark enough to make you feel bad after laughing.

And incase you didn't notice, the movie wasn't supposed to be scary. Please point out to me where you believed the movie was supposed to be scary. You really can't say that it was even advertised as a horror film at all. That's like critisizing "Titanic" for not being scary. It wasn't supposed to be.

"And why did a serious singer like Sarah Brightman sign on and donate her pipes to this infernal, self-indulgent misfire?"

Pardon me? Sarah Brightman was thrilled to play the part of Blind Mag when asked. And watching the movie, you can feel she put her soul into the part. Who cares that she's a big-time opera star? She was amazing in Repo! And it was her choice in the first place to do it.

"Director Darren Lynn Bousman must have hoped to make a cult favorite along the lines of Rocky Horror Picture Show. "

I find it entertaining how you compare it to RHPS and then go on to critisize Repo! as if it were supposed to be anything but something similiar to RHPS. Seriously. If you sliced up RHPS like you sliced up Repo, you'd probably have WAY more to say about Rocky Horror, mainly because, like Repo!, it was so out there that there really is no critisizing it, just taking it in. You critisize it for it's content, not the cutting, not the camera angles...it's content. If we're going to slice up things that are so out there, then please, go on. Critisize RHPS. I dare you. Like RHPS, Repo! is so out there that there is not making it something that it's not then critisizing it for not being that that you have made it. (If that made any sense to you.)

"With forgettable tunes, from generic power pop to overbearing heavy metal"

Forgettable? FORGETTABLE? You can't deny that people walked out of every showing of Repo! humming the tune of one of it's many unforgettable songs such as "Zydrate Anatomy" or "Seventeen".

And heavy metal? Need I even comment? Anyone who actually WATCHED Repo! The Genetic Opera can tell you that there is absolutely no heavy metal in it. And I am a heavy metal fan. I would know. I think the closest thing to 'heavy metal' in the entire movie may have been Graverobber's howling "GRAAAVVVVEEEESSSS!!" But that was one word. Hollered twice as part of one of the most unforgettable scenes of the movie.

All in all, I ask you to revisit Repo! The Genetic Opera. Walk into that theater (or plug in the DVD come January 20th) and rewatch this event without any expectations and then tell me what you think.

I really, in my heart, believe that you were not watching the same Repo! The Genetic Opera as I was.

Have a nice day.